Bush answered: "Information is moving-- you know, nightly news is one way, of course, but it’s also moving through the blogosphere, and through the Internets."
Then, another supporter asked the President "What do you pray about? And how can we pray for you?"
Bush replied* "Did you misplace your A Christian's Duty in a Time of War pamphlet? Be sure to order another one or borrow a pamphlet from one of the Christian soldiers returning from Iraq. Many of them have fulfilled their religious duty to pray for me, because, you know, I'M the one who needs THEIR prayers. But in the meantime, you can hop on to the Internets and join my Presidential Prayer Team, and participate in National Day of Prayer events, including the Online Prayer Rally for me. The Online Prayer Rally for me is wonderful because it encourages Christian Americans like you to unite in prayer... for me. The rally 'allows you to be praying with your fellow brothers and sisters in Christ simultaneously' which is 'the most effective and powerful prayer possible!'
"So, the short answer, sir, is: Pray for me, and the troops who are praying for me. Pray for mental peace for me and painful boils for Pelosi. And do it through Christ... and preferably in English.
"Now, you also asked 'What do I pray about'? Well, before I pray I retire to my dark closet, and then I meditate on the Nazarene's words. You know, stuff like this:
You have heard that it was said, ‘AN EYE FOR AN EYE, AND A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH.’ But I say to you, do not resist an evil person; but whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. If anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, let him have your coat also. Whoever forces you to go one mile, go with him two. Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you.
You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR and hate your enemy.' But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
"Then I reflect on the Nazarene's words, and read excellent essays which help me to understand Biblical topics. Doing these things helps me improve my judgment so that I can wage a more Christ-like War on Terror. And don't forget that I couldn't do this without supporters like yourself. Thanks a million. Or, better make that: thanks a trillion."
A White House spokeswoman chided the reporters who were there for "rolling their eyes and smirking" during the questioning. Then she said a prayer** for the media.
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* The last quote is fake. Bush actually just answered: "Wisdom and strength, and my family, is what I'd like for you to pray for."
** Again, not really.
Update: Rove won't be taking part in Pray Day.
